Birthdays are always a time
of reflection for me. Each year, I find myself looking at the last year of my life,
the experiences, the memories made, the lessons learned, the people I’ve
connected with, the heartbreak, the challenges, the healing, the
accomplishments… It’s interesting because truly no two years are alike. Smile.
I’ve had years that seemed like they’d completely break me, I’ve experienced
deep losses, grief, tragedy… My heart has been broken, my faith has been
shaken, but through it ALL, God has ALWAYS carried me, strengthened me,
comforted me, guided me, provided for me, pushed me, pulled me, and paved the
way for me. All He’s required of me, is that I walk with Him. Choosing Christ,
is one of, if not the very best decision I’ve ever made. Because of His love in
my heart, I am a better mother, sister, friend, leader, woman, and yes, now
wife. Looking over this last year of my life, I am fully amazed and blown away
by ALL that God has done in my life. I can’t do anything but shake my head,
close my eyes, and smile.
Looking back, at one of the
hardest times of my life after losing my little brother, which brought with it
and freshly opened the wound of also having lost my mother, there was a day, a
moment, in which I CRIED OUT to God in my overwhelming grief… In that moment,
the Holy Spirit in me pressed upon my spirit to pick up and open my Bible. God
had something for me. I opened my Bible directly to Isaiah 61. As I began to
read, it was as if the voice of God was speaking every single word directly
into my spirit. It is hard to put into words, what I experienced that day.
However, it was one of the most pivotal spiritual moments of my life. God
transformed my life in that moment… He spoke His purpose for my life into me,
He revealed to me WHY I had lived the life I had lived, the losses I’d
suffered, the pain, the heartache… and the PURPOSE behind all of it. Lord, He
put my heart back together in that very moment… He picked me up and dusted me
off. He restored my hope and allowed me to see my life through His lens instead
of my own. Although, even though in that moment, my life changed… I truly had
no idea just how much and/or what God had planned and in store for me. Smile.
My God. Nothing comes close to His love.
I could never have imagined
or dreamed the plans God had for me. (SN: This is why we can NEVER give up.
For those of you who are reading this and you are hurting, feeling alone,
broken, hopeless, angry, whatever it is you are feeling, whatever it is you are
going through, be encouraged. Don’t you dare give up. Even though you can’t see
it now, God has a plan for your life too. He LOVES you. He has things in store
for you, that you can’t even fathom right now. You’d never believe He could
take you from where you are now to where you will be…. But He will. If you just
trust Him. Let Him. Take it ONE day at a time. Just give God time.)
This year has overwhelmed
me in the most wonderful of ways. God has showered his love and joy upon me in
ways I can’t even begin to express in words. He has opened the flood gate of
love and it is gushing in every area of my life. He has filled my life with
more joy, peace, love, and hope than I’d ever imagined possible. This is what
it truly means to be “blessed.”
