Simply Put, "Two Wrongs Don't Make a Right."

Sisters, I have to share something with you... something that I am not very proud of. I am being transparent with you though, because sometimes the moments that we aren't the most proud of, are the ones that cause the most growth. "Count it pure joy, my [sisters], whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you." James 1:2-5

The other day, I went to a passport agency with hopes of getting my daughter a new passport, as hers has expired. The woman who "assisted" me was extremely rude, spoke to me in a condescending tone, and seemed to grow more agitated with each question I asked. Because my daughter's father is a contractor working overseas right now, and passport applications for minors require the signature of both parents, her case is one of unique circumstances. The woman who was "assisting" me, was NOT very forthcoming and did not seem especially intent on providing me with the necessary information to see that my daughter's application would be filed correctly and/or efficiently. I felt myself beginning to grow more and more agitated. I felt as a paying customer, I was not receiving respectful or courteous service. 

*side note* I think this is a good time to share with you, a little something about me.
Before I gave my life to Christ, when poked or prodded, I would usually respond in a likewise manner. I wasn't one to walk around looking for a fight, but at the same time, if mistreated or mishandled, I wasn't backing down either. I didn't bite my tongue. If someone came "looking", they were likely to leave with a piece of my mind. And that was just the way it was... until Christ came in and showed me the err of my ways. You see, two wrongs... do not make a right.

Which brings us back to the other day... While I did not get into a verbal altercation with this woman, I felt extremely disrespected. I know that while I did not verbally respond in a negative manner (as I may have, in the past), my facial expressions and body language certainly did the talking for me - and what they said, wasn't pretty. She continued to provide minimal and inadequate responses to my questions and I continued to express my dissatisfaction through exasperated sighs and the rolling of my eyes. As you can see, not a good cycle. And more than that, not very Christ-like on my behalf. Eventually, I asked her where the aggression that seemed to follow any questions I asked, was coming from. She responded with, "You can go. I'm done here." Apparently she was under the impression that I would now leave, having waited there for over 30 minutes to be seen in the first place, and having accomplished zilch. I asked to speak to her manager (something I probably should have done as soon as I realized we were not going to have a pleasant or successful exchange). 

She went in the back to get her manager. When the manager appeared, she was alone - the lady never reappeared. I ended up speaking with the manager and she provided me excellent customer service, competently addressed all of my questions and concerns, and provided me all of the necessary steps and options in order to get my daughter's application started and processed. She informed me that I needed to bring some paperwork back in order to get the process rolling. 

When I left the office, and as I ran the exchange back through my mind, I felt extremely frustrated....................... with myself. Yes, the lady was extremely rude. Yes, I was the customer, and as such should have been treated with a certain level of respect and courtesy. Yes, as an employee in customer service she is expected to provide a certain level of customer service. We are all familiar with the popular phrase & thought process that the customer is always right. Yes, she was dead wrong.... But then again, so was I. Bigger than her role as an employee and mine as a customer, is my role as a CHRISTIAN. The frustration I felt, was disappointment. It was the conviction I felt in my heart, that I'd let my Father down. I let my "feelings" get the best of me, and as a direct result, I missed an opportunity to share the love of Christ.

In that exchange, I had an opportunity to LOVE that woman as God loves me [and you]. His word tells us that it is EASY to love only those who also love us - what reward is there in that? For even the sinners, love those who also love them. God's love is shown when we love those who are difficult to love, when regardless of our surroundings or feelings, or ANY outside stimulus, we respond in a manner that glorifies our Father in Heaven. We are to respond instead of reacting. When we "respond", we submit to Christ and allow Him to move in us. We die to our flesh and allow the Holy Spirit to operate fully in us. When we "re-act" we are completely operating in our flesh - returning tit-for-tat... and God is not glorified in that. There is no light in such reactions. "With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse human beings, who have been made in God’s likeness. Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers and sisters, this should not be. Can both fresh water and salt water flow from the same spring?" James 3:9-10

That day, I behaved as any other human might have, in a similar situation. My reaction may have even been considered "mild" by some. I even felt completely justified [in my flesh], but I know that as a Christian I am held to a higher standard. I know better, therefore, I need to and am expected to do better. God calls us to be different - to stand out. It's when we don't stoop to the level of others, when we repay evil with good, that others take notice - and this is when God is glorified. This is when we have an opportunity to allow our words and actions to minister to the hearts of others. This is when we are given the opportunity to show the world, that there is another way. A way of love, peace, kindness, and patience... sound familiar? 
"Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things." 1 Corinthians 13:4-7

Remember the popular saying and the bracelets: "What would Jesus do?". I miss that. I think that was good. It is a litmus test
 [ A test that uses a single indicator to prompt a decision} for Christians. 
The question has a long history. In 1896 the Kansas Congregational minister Charles Sheldon published a novel called 'In His Steps: What would Jesus do?' in which a town is revolutionized when Christians pledge themselves, earnestly and honestly for an entire year, not to do anything without first asking the question, 'What would Jesus do?' Doesn't sound like a bad idea to me... Earnestly and honestly, not doing anything, without first asking the question, "What would Jesus do?"

When the world sees something "different" in you, it piques their interest and curiosity. When you smile when others would frown, when you remain calm when others would explode, it testifies to the power of God at work within you. "...so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight." 1 Peter 3:1-4 Granted, these verses were directed toward wives, but the principles remain the same:  

• any of them who do not believe the word, they may be won over without word 
• when they see the purity and reverence of your lives
• Your beauty should not come from outward adornment 
• Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.

Fortunately, my passport story does not end there. Later that day, I returned to the office with the necessary paperwork. When I pulled my number and took a seat, I watched the woman who had previously helped me. I noticed that for everything she wasn't, one thing she was, was consistent. She consistently provided every poor soul who braved her counter with the same less than desirable service I'd received. But as I sat there, God began to speak to my heart and I began to hope for the opportunity to speak with her again. God placed it on my heart to apologize to that woman, for my role in our negative exchange. Call it what you want: human nature, pride, or just plain stubbornness, but it is NOT easy to admit when you are wrong. {Maybe it's just ME...... but I don't think so.} Anyway, I sat in that office, talking to... [arguing maybe].... no, pleading with.... okay - bargaining, with God. This is what I came up with, "Alright God, I will apologize to her, IF she calls my number. If not, well..... *shrugs*" 
My number was called and to my dismay AND relief, as chance would have it, I would not be served by the same woman. But as God would have it, I would apologize. I finished up at the window I was called to and then... I sat back down and waited for the other lady to finish up with the woman I was to apologize to. She became available, I began to approach her, swallowed (what I'm sure was my pride), and allowed God's light to shine brightly in me, once again. I apologized to her. I told her that although I'd felt completely disrespected during our last exchange, that was no excuse for me to respond the way I did. Two wrongs don't make a right. I acknowledged that I contributed to the direction our exchange went and I apologized for my attitude and tone. I finished by telling her I hoped the remainder of her day would be blessed and peaceful. I could tell by the way she tensed up and seemingly prepared to pounce, as she saw me approaching her, that an apology was the LAST thing she expected to hear from me. In fact, I believe I was half-way through my apology, before she relaxed enough to realize I was actually apologizing. 

God used this experience to remind me of two things:

1. As ambassadors of Christ, we are to be representatives of Christ and reflect His love to the world - to be an example to believers in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith and in purity.

and

2. When I DO fall short, and it will happen again, as we are all imperfect beings, "for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and all are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus," Romans 3:23-24 that I am to own up to it, acknowledge it. I need to first apologize and repent to my Heavenly Father, receive His correction AND forgiveness -- and then, acknowledge, admit, and/or apologize to the person I've offended.

"My little children, these things I write to you, so that you may not sin. And if anyone sins, we have an Advocate with the Father, Jesus Christ the righteous. And He Himself is the propitiation for our sins, and not for ours only but also for the whole world.

The Test of Knowing Him

Now by this we know that we know Him, if we keep His commandments. He who says, “I know Him,” and does not keep His commandments, is a liar, and the truth is not in him. But whoever keeps His word, truly the love of God is perfected in him. By this we know that we are in Him. He who says he abides in Him ought himself also to walk just as He walked." 1 John 2:1-6

We are all growing in Christ. The key is for your growth to be intentional. When you know better, do better. I am thankful to have a Father in Heaven, who loves me enough to correct me when I am wrong.  

"And have you completely forgotten this word of encouragement that addresses you as a father addresses his son? It says, “My son, do not make light of the Lord’s discipline, and do not lose heart when he rebukes you, because the Lord disciplines the one he loves, and he chastens everyone he accepts as his son.” Hebrews 12:5-6

Let's talk:
HAS THERE EVER BEEN A TIME THAT YOU HAVE DONE SOMETHING WRONG, AND GOD HAS CORRECTED YOU? How did you handle it? How did you grow from that experience?

WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU WERE MOVED BY GOD TO APOLOGIZE TO SOMEONE? What were the circumstances surrounding that situation? How was the apology received?