Who Chose Your Church Home: You, HIM, or Them?

"...And how can they hear without someone preaching to them? And how can anyone preach unless they are sent? As it is written: “How beautiful are the feet of those who bring good news!”

Romans 10:14-15

Choosing your church home is not a decision that should be taken lightly. Nor is it one, that should be decided for you, by outside influences. One could even argue that, after accepting Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior, it is one of the most important decisions you'll make, in your life. It certainly trumps where you choose to live, the home you buy, where you work, what school your children attend, etc. Don't get me wrong, these are all very important decisions which require you to be informed, to do your homework, and to SEEK God before deciding upon, but where you choose to worship can have lasting spiritual affects for generations to come. This is a decision that not only affects you, but can affect all who you come in contact with: your children, husband, extended family, friends, co-workers. Where you choose to worship, fellowship, and be fed the word of God, can have major effects [positive OR negative] on your spiritual walk with Christ. Where you attend, can either stunt or provoke growth in your life. It will either challenge you to constantly evolve and strengthen your personal relationship with Christ OR enable and encourage complacency. Many people are joined to churches for all the wrong reasons, and it is proving to be detrimental to their spirit. If you aren't challenged and pushed to grow and mature, if you aren't held accountable by your Pastor and leadership, if you don't feel loved, if you aren't being taught biblically-based lessons, if you don't feel the presence of God - if you've never ASKED GOD, if you are where HE would have you to be - I urge you to do so, today, and then, to listen when He speaks. We can't make spiritual decisions, based on natural factors. As Pastor Lewis says, "Don't sacrifice your spiritual growth for natural reasons." I would actually like to share an excerpt from one of his lessons titled "Right Place", and I will follow that by sharing with you, my personal testimony, as it relates to this topic! I pray that you are blessed!

Matthew 13:58 - 'And he did not many mighty works there because of their unbelief.'

Where you choose to worship, is just that - a choice! It is a personal decision. "If you are there because your cousins and aunties are there, then that's your choice. What tends to happen many times is that we stunt our spiritual growth because the place we worship is not what we need. The sermons are irrelevant to us, the people don't like us, and the ministry doesn't receive the gift God placed in us. But we waste our time fighting for our gift and feeling like it's the devil that is trying to make us leave. We feel like we have to do battle with the enemy to worship freely and be accepted by that particular body, so we must stay and fight for our liberty! But didn't Jesus already do that? My friend, if you are being persecuted there, and if you don't have peace there, and if the sermons are not helping you grow there, and if you are not enjoying the services there, then why in the world would the DEVIL try to make you leave? Sounds like he found a way to stop your spiritual growth, and keep you in bondage. That's perfect for him. He is the one that is trying to make you stay! The enemy will keep telling you that you should not leave a church because you will be a church hopper! The church members will make you feel like you are going to hell because you are leaving them. But that's because they can't see past where they are. It's not about the natural church building, but it's about the church building that we all live in. And you must find a group of people that believe like you do and will accept what God has in you before you can enjoy the fellowship with them. It doesn't matter how long you have been there. It doesn't matter if you have a little position there and you don't want to give it up. If you want more, then ask God for more and he will direct you to receive more. But as long as you settle for where you are, you will struggle to receive from God. Don't sacrifice your spiritual growth for natural reasons. Go where you can grow and become what God has intended for you." - Pastor Craig Lewis

I've moved around quite a bit, so fortunately or unfortunately, depending on how one looks at it, I've had a bit of experience choosing a church home. It's fortunate, in that, I am able to now share this experience with all of you and unfortunate in that,
I've had the hard time of leaving amazing ministries that were truly "home" to me. Even in that, I've seen the way God has moved in my life. In 2007, my life forever changed for the better - I rededicated my life to Christ and was baptized, and joined Harvest Life Changers Church in Woodbridge, VA. My pastors there, Lyle and Deborah Dukes, will forever hold special places in my heart.

How did I come to join Harvest Life Changers? Well, you see, I grew up IN CHURCH, literally. My grandfather is a Pastor and my grandmother (may she rest in peace) a First Lady. They saw to it that all of us grandchildren attended church regularly. Once I graduated high school, and as an adult, although I can't say that I ever strayed far, I must admit, God was not the head of my life. With that being said, I am Oh so thankful to my grandparents for the seeds they sowed in my life, for the foundation they established in my heart. Even as I was not acknowledging Christ, in all of my ways, I held tight to much of what I'd been taught. The values and beliefs were a core part of who I was, and He never left me.

Which brings us back to 2007 - I was new to the DC/VA area, and didn't know many people. God began to pull on me... to call me... "Daughter... come home." I felt such a weight on my heart - I felt a pull. I decided I was going to start attending church again. I started my search for a new church home, online. I simply googled Christian churches in my area code. So with my daughter in tow, we began visiting new churches. Each Sunday, we would attend a different ministry. If there was a connection, sometimes we would find ourselves visiting again, maybe a few times. It was during this time of "visiting" that I happened upon Harvest Life Changers. But if I am completely honest with you, the first time we visited Harvest, I had no intention on returning. You see, Harvest is a much bigger ministry than I was accustomed to attending and during my first visit, I felt the speakers/audio system was too loud. Granted this may seem like a small thing for some, but I didn't feel it was good for my little one's ears either. Our search continued. Then one day a co-worker invited me to the Mother's Day service, at her church. I hadn't planned to attend service that Sunday, as I wasn't in the best of spirits. I lost my mother just before my 18th birthday and since then, holidays - especially Mother's Day, can be hard for me. But, I took her up on her invitation anyway [and I'm so thankful I did]. Maybe you've guessed it by now, her church just happened to be Harvest. God had a plan for me. :) My daughter and I attended the Mother's Day service at Harvest Life Changers, and God spoke straight to my heart, through Pastor Dukes. I found myself at the alter, I felt God's arms wrapped around me, and that's where I've been ever since - in my Heavenly Father's arms. From that moment on, I couldn't get enough of God, of His word, of being in His presence. Week two of attending Harvest, I decided to attend Bible study, and I was HOOKED. I have found that Sundays are more about praise & worship, a time to bask in God's presence and offer Him my heart of worship - and - Bible Study is when the reading and teaching really happens. This is usually when there is more time to dig into God's word. If you are one, who usually attends only Sunday services, I would love to suggest you attend your church's Bible study, during the week. I am sure you will be blessed! It wasn't long before I was completely plugged in. I attended Sunday and Wednesday night services regularly, I served on the nursery ministry (amongst others), and my daughter was in the children's choir. We loved our church home. It was a place where we felt God's loving presence, where we were taught and held accountable, and where our spirits were nurtured. Two year's later, I moved back to Las Vegas.

The search for a new church home began. Now, this is where it gets interesting - because as I mentioned to you before, my Grandfather is a Pastor. His church, the very same one I grew up in, is in Las Vegas. Not only that, but my sister and best friend is in Vegas, and attends a different church. So by conventional standards, it would seem only "natural" that I attend either my Grandfather's church OR my sister's, and I did. I did so as part of my "visiting" phase, but God did not release me to join either of their churches. Again, when I moved to Vegas, I attended several churches, actually more than I care to share... but that's another story, for another day. ;) The only difference in the process I went through in Vegas vs. Virginia, was that at this point I was a much more mature Christian and knew more of what I needed and what to look for in my church home. Not only that, but my daughter was older now and able to also provide feedback - which is REALLY important. You attend service as a FAMILY, and as such, the decision on where to worship should involve the entire family. Allowing your children to share in the decision provides them with a sense of ownership. If they have some say in where you all worship, they are more likely to be receptive to attending. So this time around, as we visited, instead of only visiting the ministries on Sundays, we would "visit" a church for at least a week (assuming the Sunday visit provided some connection), so that we could experience the Bible Study as well. After a while, and many many churches later, I began to get slightly discouraged. I remember visiting church after church, many times not even opening my Bible once during entire services. How could this be? How is the Bible not referenced once in a service? I remember thinking "Maybe I'll never find a church home like Harvest; one where I feel at home." On top of that, around this time, each time we visited a church they were having guest speakers/preachers. I began to get a little frustrated thinking, "Oh goodness, at this rate, I'll never know where I am supposed to be. I don't even get to hear the head of church." I shared my thoughts and feelings with my sister and she suggested that I visit her church again, the following Sunday. As I'd enjoyed attending with her in the past, I agreed. You see, there was NOTHING "wrong" with her church, so to say, it just wasn't for me. That is something we all have to realize. Just because your friends, your family, etc attend a certain church, it doesn't make it for you, by association. And the AWESOME thing about my sister AND my Grandfather, is that they NEVER took it personally - although OTHERS did.You'd be amazed at some of my family members who would give me a hard time for not attending my Grandfather's church... but wait, it gets better... these same people, who were judging me and looking down at me for not attending a particular church - weren't attending ANY church! Smh. Here they are, not even attending church at all, but have the nerve to feel entitled to dictate to me which church I should attend. Absurd right? Yet I almost let them get to me... I almost let their words and opinions determine where I would worship. But God! On the opposite end of the spectrum, was my sister and Grandfather, Christians after God's own heart, who supported me and encouraged me to go where God would have me to be, knowing that where I worshipped in no way was a reflection of my love and respect for them - it is not about any ONE personally, but bigger than all of us. God has a purpose for each of us and it's not always tied to our family and friends. So, that Sunday, I visited my sister's church again and lo and behold, her pastor announced that a Guest Pastor would be preaching. My sister and I just looked at each other and laughed! ANOTHER guest pastor?? What were the odds... Little did I know, this was ALL a part of God's awesome plan. Once the guest pastor began teaching, it didn't take long for me to realize my spirit had been awakened! I was hanging on his every word, my bible was open in my lap, and I couldn't take notes fast enough. I was learning, we were in the word, God was speaking to my heart... and for the first time, since I'd arrived in Vegas I felt like I just might have found our new pastor. Immediately upon the conclusion of that service, I asked around, found out the name of the pastor's church, and planned to attend the very next Sunday! I was so very excited!! We attended and instantly knew in my heart, that was the place God desired for us to be. Granted, from the outside looking in, my church home in VA and my new church home in Vegas, other than being non-denominational, couldn't have been more different from each other... but one thing remained the same - we were being fed the unadulterated word of God, felt the love of God, were encouraged and pushed to grow spiritually, and enabled to operate in God's grace, using the gifts and talents He has blessed us with!

I'm here to tell you that God has a plan for you - and one of the major parts of that plan, is WHERE you worship. God placed me strategically, in both of those ministries for a reason and for a season. I was where I needed to be, at the time that I needed to be. In my first church home, I was fed the word in a manner that blessed me as a "new" or "baby" Christian. They helped me to grow and layed a solid foundation for me spiritually. They encouraged and taught me good study, prayer, and worship habits. Once I reached a point in my growth, God knew I was ready to move on... as much as I loved my first church home, God had other plans for me. We have to be willing to move, when He says move, no matter how comfortable we are. The growth that occurred in me in my 2nd church home is invaluable. My life was blessed TREMENDOUSLY by serving God under my Pastor. I was pushed to new heights and deeper depths in my relationship with Christ and in my faith-walk. Had I never left VA, I would have remained at the same level - stagnant. God knows what we need, and WHEN we need it!

Bottom line - we have to get to a place where we are rooted enough in our own personal relationship with Christ, that when He speaks to us, we hear His voice AND obey. We have to get to a place where we are more concerned with pleasing God, than pleasing man. It is so important that we seek GOD in ALL our ways - that we acknowledge Him. Make sure you are in the place that God has purposed you to be. If you have been a member of a church for years, and you haven't grown spiritually, are still battling the SAME struggles, and don't know that you KNOW you are where God has called you to be - talk to HIM. Ask and He will surely lead you and direct you. God has plans to prosper us and to give us a hope and a future. I love you and I pray that you would seek His desire for your life, and that includes where you worship. If God is calling you to move and/or to join a church in the first place, I pray that He would bless you with the strength and the courage to do so!

LET'S TALK (share your thoughts and experiences): 

How did YOU come to be connected to your church home? How has being a member there, enriched and/or blessed your life? How have you grown since being there? In what ways do you serve/ what ministries are you a part of? Do you feel God pulling you in a different direction? 

Share your experience and bless others who may be in similar situations!!